A laugh a day...

keeps the doctor away. Trust me.

You gotta love Billy Connolly. OK, he is Scottish and hence hard to understand for some. OK, he does not watch his language. But he cracks me up.

Watch him tell you what he thinks about Opera (which is the video with the least foul language I could find :-)



Another one of my favorite laughter resources is The Fast Show. Gotta like British humor. And if you like Johnny Depp and British humor, enjoy the Suit You Tailors (unless you mind filthy language and sex-obsessed men... don't tell me I didn't warn you).



If you prefer Robbie Williams to Johnny, click here.

It is rewarding to find someone you like, but it is essential to like yourself - Jo Coudert

It is rewarding to find someone you like, but it is essential to like yourself. It is quickening to recognize that someone is a good and decent human being, but it is indispensable to view yourself as acceptable. It is a delight to discover people who are worthy of respect and admiration and love, but it is vital to believe yourself deserving of these things.

For you cannot live in someone else. You cannot find yourself in someone else. You cannot be given a life by someone else. Of all the people you will know in a lifetime, you are the only one you will never leave or lose.

To the question of your life, you are the only answer. To the problems of your life, you are the only solution.

- Jo Coudert

What would you do if you knew you could not fail?

Today one of my articles was included in the Carnival of Personal Development.

This is where I came across The Path to Purpose posted by Erin Pavlina (wife of Steve Pavlina).

Now I am not a supporter of the paranormal, but her article struck a cord.

Last year in July I wrote about having a bucket list. It made me thoughtful to see that I have realised two of the things listed (I visited my friend in Spain and painted, a little). Should I say only? In a way yes, because I have not done much in order to achieve the other things. I have been thinking a lot about writing a book, having my own bookshop and starting a charity. But thinking doesn't get me anywhere unless I DO something with it.

Erin wrote that she asked her husband for help when she felt stuck in a rut. His answer was a question: "What would you do if you knew you couldn’t fail?"

WOW! I have read many suggestions, questions and tips and tricks on how to live the life you're meant to live, how to find the purpose you're on this earth for. But nothing has ever hit me like this question.

Steve also suggested an exercise which Erin calls the Heart, Body, Mind, and Soul exercise. Steve discusses this in his article, Living Congruently. The exercise asks you to answer these four questions:

• What do you want to do? (desire)
• What can you do? (ability)
• What should you do? (purpose)
• What must you do? (need)

Steve writes that when these four areas are aligned, motivation occurs automatically. Thought and action are automatically balanced because you are living your purpose consciously. You won’t feel like you should be thinking when you’re acting or acting when you’re thinking. The line between thought and action will disappear. Being and doing will become the same thing.

He continues to say that when you experience misalignment between these four areas/questions, the natural tendency is to slow down… sometimes to a crawl. You’ll feel like you have all these ideas pulling you in different directions, but you aren’t fully satisfying any of them. Your mind knows that continuing to work hard is likely to be futile and won’t solve the real problem of incongruence. It knows it’s time for you to stop, ask directions, and choose the path of alignment.

The result is: Work = play = love.

That sounded so tempting to me that I have started to write down my WANT/DESIRE list. Tomorrow I will move on to the CAN list...

So, what would you do if you couldn't fail? Are you doing it? Why not?

Your life tomorrow will be the result of your attitudes and the choices you make today.

THE CARPENTER's HOUSE   -   

Author unknown

An elderly carpenter was ready to retire. He told his employer-contractor of his plans to leave the house building business and live a more leisurely life with his wife enjoying his extended family.

He would miss the paycheck, but he needed to retire. They could get by. The contractor was sorry to see his good worker go and asked if he could build just one more house as a personal favor. The carpenter said yes, but in time it was easy to see that his heart was not in his work. He resorted to shoddy workmanship and used inferior materials. It was an unfortunate way to end his career.

When the carpenter finished his work and the builder came to inspect the house, the contractor handed the front-door key to the carpenter. "This is your house," he said, "my gift to you."

What a shock! What a shame! If he had only known he was building his own house, he would have done it all so differently. Now he had to live in the home he had built none too well.

So it is with us. We build our lives in a distracted way, reacting rather than acting, willing to put up less than the best. At important points we do not give the job our best effort. Then with a shock we look at the situation we have created and find that we are now living in the house we have built. If we had realized that we would have done it differently. 

Think of yourself as the carpenter. Think about your house. Each day you hammer a nail, place a board, or erect a wall. Build wisely. It is the only life you will ever build. Even if you live it for only one day more, that day deserves to be lived graciously and with dignity. The plaque on the wall says, "Life is a do-it-yourself project." Your life tomorrow will be the result of your attitudes and the choices you make today.

Tis nothing good or bad/ But thinking makes it so - William Shakespeare

I invite you to discover below TED talk from Daniel Gilbert, psychologist and happiness expert, author of  Stumbling on Happiness.

He is able to prove that having too many choices - something we consider being positive - can work in our disadvantage and make us unhappy.

I always considered choice to be a luxury, but Gilbert got me thinking... I find it deviously and devilishly interesting to see how humans can be tested into traps they create themselves. I know myself and I would have pondered and worried about having picked the right picture. 

Thus, sometimes, not having a choice actually makes you happier - in the long run anyway.

Quote from Adam Smith's Theory of Moral Sentiments, 1759

"The great source of both the misery and disorders of human life, seems to arise from over-rating the difference between one permanent situation and another... some of these situations may, no doubt, deserve to be preferred to others, but none of them can deserve to be pursued with that passionate ardour which drives us to violate the rules either of prudence or of justice, or to corrupt the future tranquility of our minds, either by shame from the remembrance of our own folly, or by remorse for (sic, printed quote says "from") the horror of our own injustice."

Word of the year 2009

I have recently written about theWord of the year started by Christine Kane and about the choice of words I was juggling with.

I can now gladly say that I have chosen one for 2009. My word is Serenity. 

SERENITY

1. The quality or state of being serene; clearness and calmness; quietness; stillness; peace.

2. Calmness of mind; eveness of temper; undisturbed state; coolness; composure. 

I believe that serenity will help me with the other issues I struggle with daily (creativity, focus, effortlessness, presence, and other words that popped up in the meantime).

I have read The Power of now  and The Secret and have been thinking a lot about what it takes to live a happy life and not get submerged in the nitty gritty stuff. 

Over the past weeks I have had this in the back of my mind and it has triggered moments where I stop myself to think, to reflect, or on the contrary has made me stop the thinking in order to just look or enjoy the moment. 

I find it challenging because there are so many things to do in a day, so many distractions, so many stressful moments. It is difficult to remain serene. However, I notice that with the little attention I am giving it, things have already improved. My goal is to make it a habit, a way of life. I want to think happy, positive thoughts, do good things and in return attract good things.

Ever since I became a mother two and a half years ago, my life has taken a spin. The days started to be so filled with 'not-me' stuff. Focusing on the baby and giving basically 100% was something I was gladly willing to do, but it also nibbled at me a little bit. So now that I have two boys and that my youngest has passed that 100% needy stage, I am trying to balance my days and time.

I want to be there for my kids, my husband, do my job, take care of the household, continue to cook healthy meals for the children. In order to do that I need to have 'me-time' to charge up my batteries. I need to run, paint, write, read and daydream. And I often feel guilty for it.

So my goal is to find the necessary serenity that allows me to find the perfect balance that suits me and my life.

Wish me luck. And let me know if you have a word of the year for 2009 or some sort of resolution that goes in that direction.

Your talent lies in your choice - Stella Adler

(picture CHOICES by Melanie Weidner)

Asking questions are the most important first steps to positive changes in the development of your talent, your career.  The act of asking questions sets our course to investigate, explore, wonder, and do.

Questioning stimulates action. 

Questions enhance our choices, and our results. 

So find out what's on your mind. Look at a problem, a path you consider, a goal you are looking for and ask yourself many questions. Look at it from many different angles, points of view. 
Pretend to be someone else, say your complete opposite, and think about what such a person would choose. How does that make you feel? Does it confirm your choice or make you doubt?

Choice is nothing else than the chisel we use to sculpt our life. Every choice we make takes us closer to or further away from our goals.

As Harry Emerson Fosdick wrote, "He who chooses the beginning of a road, chooses the place it leads to. It is the means that determine the end."

Sometimes, when we get to a fork in our road, we will find that one of the paths is easy to take. But that may be the only good thing about it. Is it a path of temptation? Or is it a noble path?

Besides smart versus stupid and good versus bad choices, there is also the choice of non-action. If we don't make a choice, we do nothing. And we have to be aware that it is our decision to do nothing. We give over to fate to sculpt our life instead of shaping it ourselves.

We have to ask ourselves whether we can do this or whether we just want it because we are tempted? We have to always look for the good. No life is so difficult that it cannot be made better by changing and improving our attitude. Because if we cannot change the circumstances, we can always change ourselves.

When we make a choice, do we make it out of habit, for instant rewarding or is it really a conscious choice, made especially for that occasion and reason? It is not always easy. The journal Nature suggests that in order to explore new and potentially rewarding options, the brain has to override the desire for immediate profit. Do you want to wait 10 minutes to eat two cookies or do you want one cookie now?

Having a cookie now caters to the immediate desire for pleasure, but waiting a little bit for the two cookies may be the more logical, most rewarding option.

"By exploring, we are forgoing the comfortable option in order to do something that might be better in the long run." says Nathaniel Daw,  co-author of the study.

Read also an earlier post of mine on Choices are luxuries - or are they?